oh dear god.

cbs5.com – ‘Virgin Mary’ Seen In Texas Grocery Store Freezer:

first of all, why is this news? water freezes. it’s been freezing for billions of years. sometimes, it freezes in fantastical and beautiful shapes, kinda like clouds sometimes form shapes in the sky. this is not news; it’s second grade science. now, i know i’m not a reporter, but i can think of a few news stories i’d rather see. like, say, the genocide in darfur, or the war in iraq, or any number of other more important things. there are even better human interest stories, like volunteers at nursing homes or people who write letters to soldiers. and yet, we have to waste a web page and a minute of broadcast news time to cover this “story”. liberal media, my ass.

second, if god does exist and wanted to send some sort of message to humanity, or even a small town in texas for that matter, i would like to think that his/her/their chosen platform wouldn’t be a grocery store freezer.

spontaneously igniting one of those government-issue shrubs outside the post office might do nicely; it connects the old testament “power and majesty” with the hum-drum of small town life.

ugh. i need coffee.

Published by


I'm just this guy, you know?