Grant Dobbe

i got called a “hippie, liberal douche” today for posting the google bomb that used to be here. i’d like to discuss this now.

let’s start with hippie… maybe. i mean, i do enjoy my bowl of granola and organic low-fat milk in the morning, and i do buy fair-trade, shade-grown coffee. i take short showers to conserve water, i use a nalgene bottle to cut down on plastic consumption, and most of my choices as a consumer tend to favor the local economy. in addition, i try and do all of my shopping on one day and drive as little as possible in order to cut down my use of fossil fuels.

but at the same time, i enjoy the mindless banality of television as much as the next guy, i buy my clothes at target and the gap, and i leave my computer on all the time, which definitely contributes to fossil fuel use. so yeah, there’s definitely a hippie streak in me, but it’s not as deep as it could be.

on to liberal. yes, definitely. i think the war in iraq is wrong, i think that a woman should have the right to choose what to do with her own body, and i think it is the responsibility of the government to at least do something to reduce the cost of health care in this country, if not pay for it entirely. i also think deficit spending to stimulate economic growth is stupid, and that responsible energy policy isn’t developed in closed meetings with oil company executives. the current administration is corrupt to the bone, the republican majority in congress (with a few exceptions like olympia snowe, lincoln chafee, and to some extent norm coleman) aren’t far behind, and it’s time to reinstitute some checks and balances to stop Dear Leader from wiping his ass with the constitution and the bill of rights. so, yes, i unabashedly, unapologetically cop to being a bleeding-heart liberal.

douche. this, i think, is gonna be hard to determine. i mean, i have done stuff like forgetting people’s birthdays, not returning phone calls simply because i haven’t wanted to, and the other things that go on a laundry list of bad shit people do. so, sometimes, yes, i am a douche.

but am i a douche for having a hippie streak and being a liberal? with the exception of the aforementioned google bomb, i have rarely done anything to rub my politics in someone else’s face. i don’t pick arguments with conservative thinkers, and i’m not of the opinion that conservative always means evil. i’d like to think that i’m fairly respectful of other people’s opinions. and the only reason i put up that google bomb was to try and make a difference in an election I see as being critical to the survival of the united states. so, in the end, i don’t really think i’m a douche, but you can call me whatever the hell you want. i don’t regret my actions, and i will not apologize for giving a shit.

now, if you’ll excuse me, i have some election day volunteer-type douchebaggery to set up.

i had one of those moments last night where the right number of serendipitous events happened, the planets aligned, and life just kind of went *click*. as a result, i know basically have some idea of what i’ll be doing the next few years.

first, a little back story.

when i graduated and took my current job at badbrain, i really had no idea what the hell i was doing. socially, intellectually, and spiritually, i was just really burned out. so i found the closest hole, jumped in, and kinda stayed there. now that i’ve had some time to think about it, it really wasn’t all that bad of an idea. i got some time to recover from four years of stress-inflicted damage, my boss got a somewhat-knowledgeable employee to help him grow a small business, and my landlord got another person to give him a monthly rent check. it worked out well for everyone, really.

well, last night, while i was laying awake in bed thinking, i realized that for the first time in a long time, i was thriving. i was working on several intellectually challenging projects at work, i had a decent relationship with my roommates, i was doing things that i wanted to do, and i while i wasn’t lighting cigars with $100 bills, i wasn’t destitute and scraping for pennies, either. the last time life seemed this good, i was a junior in college. the last time before that was high school.

and while i was thinking about that, i realized where my future was going and “the plan” just kind of clicked into place. ta-da.

so, here’s the plan:

right now, i’m rebuilding myself. i’m reading a lot of stuff simply for pleasure and entertainment, i’m working at getting involved with local affairs and events, and i’m trying to foster some new friendships. the plan for the next year and a half is to keep working at that. in addition to that, i’ll work to get myself back into some semblance of physical fitness, develop some healthy and responsible habits (such as balancing my checkbook and living closer to a budget), and get a better idea about how the real world works. in the grand scheme of the plan, that seems like it will take about a year and a half to accomplish, starting roughly now.

once i’m ready (or feel sufficiently confident that i can carry on elsewhere), i’ll apply for graduate school in computer science (probably in a network-related field), leave northfield, and make something of my life. depending on what kind of financial aid or family help i get, i’ll take some sort of tech job and do some sort of full-time/part-time arrangement. i’ll also jump into more of a professional musical ensemble again, because i’ll probably be in an urban area where something like that is feasible.

that should do until the next serendipitous click. now that i’ve turned on comments, you’re free to tell me what you think.

carry on.

i made 49 phone calls tonight on behalf of moveon.org, and it was an incredibly liberating thing. i called voters in florida and rhode island and encouraged them to vote for the democratic party in order to bring change to washington. i can truly say that it was one of the better ways i’ve spent an hour. as your friend, i encourage you to do the same and go to moveon.org. you can call for as short or as long as you are able, and you can pick the day and time you want to call. if you want to do something but don’t have time or money to do other things, this is perfect.

the other politically inspired thing i want to talk about is voting machines. the president of diebold (maker of atms, digital kiosks, and voting machines) practically promised karl rove the state of ohio in 2004. guess which brand of voting machine they used? the reports of voting machine fraud are popping up all over the place, and we need to do something about it to protect it it’s imperative that voting machines be open to inspection, use an open software platform where the code can be seen, and above all else return a paper receipt. tell your friends, tell your relatives, and tell your state officials to insist upon a transparent method of electronic voting.

that is all. carry on.

a sonnet, by ee cummings. i am truly a lucky boy.

it is at moments after i have dreamed
of the rare entertainment of your eyes,
when (being fool to fancy) i have deemed

with your peculiar mouth my heart made wise;
at moments when the glassy darkness holds

the genuine apparition of your smile
(it was through tears always)and silence moulds
such strangeness as was mine a little while;

moments when my once more illustrious arms
are filled with fascination, when my breast
wears the intolerant brightness of your charms:

one pierced moment whiter than the rest

-turning from the tremendous lie of sleep
i watch the roses of the day grow deep.

carry on.

act the first:

i went to strap on my iPod armband this morning, and found that it no longer fit at the normal size. not bad for three weeks of regular weightlifting, eh?

something similar happened after my workout, too. i put on a pair of jeans and they were loose in the waist. that hasn’t happened in months. i think my exercise program is working.

act the second:

my least favorite chore of all time is folding laundry. i don’t know what it is, but i would rather clean a bathroom floor with a toothbrush than fold laundry. that is why there’s currently two baskets of unfolded laundry sitting in my room.

what i need to do is find a pretty girl that will fold laundry for me while i cook for her. if only…

act the third:

getting a minnesota driver’s license is much more of a pain in the ass than it should be. not only do i have to provide a birth certificate in addition to my wisconsin license, i also need to take the written test. and i can’t just take the written test at any dmv location, either. some of them only offer the written test a couple days per week. therefore, i have to stop in eagan on my way back to wisconsin to get a license.

*whew*. at least i’ll finally be able to apply for minnesotacare and get some state services.

exeunt.